It's so great to be back and I hope you've had a really beautiful couple of months.
So, straight to it - I thought I'd write about stability today. Its a super-relevant topic, because my own life is about to undergo a big change and I've been observing my behaviour closely.
As it starts to set in for me that I will be moving away from everyone and everything I know, I've found myself experiencing a range of emotions from absolute trepidation, to adrenaline, to excitement, to confusion - but lastly, to feeling as though the ground beneath my feet is falling away.
I'm starting to feel a bit like a boat that had been anchored at a port for years, only to suddenly lose that anchor and float away into the unknown - a big black ocean of 'what's going to happen next?'.
I realised, as I met up with some friends for the last time, that underlying our human existence, is this complex interplay of opposing forces. In this case, the desire to live a stable and secure life, where everything is known to you, faces are familiar, routines are set; versus the desire for excitement, adventure, new discoveries and change.
I wondered if my life until this point had been a result of the interaction of these forces - each competing to supersede the other. For two decades, my innate desire for stability, security and comfort, had outweighed a niggling and growing desire to discover something new. But in recent years, this desire for adventure took the forefront and is now and truly in control.
The human psyche is fascinating. On one hand, we yearn comfort; on the other hand, we chase after Dreams. When we are in comfort, our minds are possessed by our Dreams; and when we put everything on the line for our Dreams, suddenly at the back of our mind, an echo of that desire to be 'safe' rings out.
So I guess then, that our Life, the course it takes, and our experience of it, comes down to choice. To choosing discovery and risk, over safety and security. To choosing passion, over 'this will do'. To choosing to accept pain, failure and heartbreak, rather than to accept routine and predictability.
So as we make our choices, our Life unfolds on a Path based on that choice. Which really means we have a million different Paths before us, and which way we go comes down to how prepared we are to accept the bad and live through the pain, before we get to the good.
This is a liberating thought - because it means we define the limits of our capability. The CHOICE is completely ours.
Which also means the responsibility for a decision we take, is ours to own.
There's something really beautiful about Life, and that is that it responds and shapes itself around our decisions and our willingness to listen very closely to what we really want, and go after it.
So having written all of that, starting with stability, ending in choice - I guess I can say, I'm not as afraid. Because what really do we have to be afraid of? The moment we realise that we dictate the terms of our life, that we dictate what sort of Life we want to lead, there is nothing more empowering.
So perhaps then, I was hugely mistaken - my desire for adventure didn't simply supersede my desire for comfort and security - at some point, I made a conscious decision and I became ready to live with the consequences. So our nature isn't defined by the constant push and pull of desires - a desire for safety, versus a desire for something new - but rather, the defining moments in our Lives are when we reveal our true nature - and that is when we make a choice between competing desires, and commit to it.
Our true nature reveals itself then, when we realise that we set the bar for ourselves and we decide if we're willing to do what it takes to reach, and surpass it.
With every decision, we are responding to these questions -
How big are we willing to let our lives expand? What limits have we set ourselves? And how ready are we to redefine the those limits and let Life change?
And as always, I'd love to hear what you think.
Til' next time,
Peace & Love,
A.
